the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
