I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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