Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Randomize