Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
