But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
My life is pants optional.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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