I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
