i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
