She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
