Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You brought string cheese to the strip club
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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