he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
