bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize