If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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