I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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