i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
How external is "for external use only"?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
don't judge my taste in strippers
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
