The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Randomize
