We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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