careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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