i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
