My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Only a mothe r could love this liver
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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