Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
