Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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