So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Randomize