im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize