she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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