I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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