This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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