So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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