i jhust puked up my retainher.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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