Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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