The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
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