Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
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For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
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Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
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