I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
