The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
