Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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