So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize