but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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