It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
