Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
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