people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
