So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
