I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
