the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
