Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
