I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
