I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
