and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
