so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Houston, we have a squirter
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Randomize
