just tell him i said nine months
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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