I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
