Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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